While I Am Trying To Find A New Home For My Pet Chimpanzee. . .

You all read about the chimpanzee attack today, right?

Why in the world would you keep a chimpanzee in your house as a “pet”? How in the hell did this family get around zoning laws in Stamford CONNECTICUT? I would be surprised to find out that you could own chickens in Stamford, never mind old world apes.  Sure, you could probably have a whole family of monkeys in a city like Waterbury, Connecticut and no one would notice, but Stamford?

So just a reminder to readers here: Chimpanzees can can bite your hands and face off after years of seemingly benign behavior. They’re wild animals, after all. Sure, they can surf the internet. And smoke. And roller skate*. But they’re animals. Get a dog or a goldfish, but stay away from chimpanzees. And if you ever DO decide to get a chimp, get it from a reputable dealer, not some anonymous loser on craigslist.  .  .

* I think I heard this on a Seinfeld episode, fyi.

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “While I Am Trying To Find A New Home For My Pet Chimpanzee. . .

  1. Thanks…that’s good advice. I’ve bought a few chimps off craiglists and none of them smoked, surfed the internet or anything cool. They just threw poo at me and stuff.

    Would Ebay be a more reputable chimp dealer. Cause, really, who doesn’t want a roller-skatin, chain smoken, funky monkey for a pet?

  2. a CNN commentator made a good point about the impossibility of ever truly domesticating a wild animal, no matter how much a person might want it to to be domesticated

  3. A chuman would not be cnrsideoed a missing link in an evolutionary sense. Breeding two present day species together to form a new one would not be a missing link from millions of years ago. (Remember, Chimpanzees are our closest living relatives not the species we evolved from. The two lines split off a theorized five million years ago from an common ape anscestor.)Anyway, I love how excited you are about science which is why I’m loving your site so don’t take my corrections wrong. You think outside the box and that is an excellent trait.

  4. i love this pet! it’s my favorite other than the husky. i have her, and she’s so cute onnile! but with this pet, i LOVE the pet and the roberta bobble head! the fish king plush is cool also, though.Crazygal

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s